Little Johnny was sitting at the kitchen table while his mother prepared dinner. His father was quietly reading the newspaper when Johnny suddenly looked up. Johnny:“Dad, why do grown-ups like to exercise in bed?” His mother stopped cooking and listened…
John brought his new work colleague, Robert, home for dinner. As they reached the front door, John’s wife rushed over, hugged him, and gave him a big kiss. Robert:“Wow! How long have you two been married?” John:“Twenty-four years.” Robert:“You must…
A man was driving through an intersection when the light turned yellow. He did the right thing and stopped at the crosswalk, even though he could have rushed through before the light turned red. The older woman driving behind him…
A wife asked her husband to drop her off at a friend’s house, where a wedding reception was being held. Wife:“Could you please drop me off at the wedding?” Husband:“I’m going to be busy at the office all day. Here’s…
A husband and wife got up early on Sunday morning. After breakfast, the wife noticed that her husband was still in his pajamas. Wife:“Why aren’t you dressed for church?” Husband:“Simple. I’m not going.” Wife:“Why not?” Husband:“I have three good reasons.…
A man walked into a bar with his dog on a leash. The bartender took one look at the dog and stared. Bartender:“That’s a strange-looking dog! It’s pink, has short legs, and no tail. But I bet my Rottweiler could…
Little Johnny was sitting in class one day when little Timmy suddenly started laughing. Teacher:“What’s so funny, Timmy?” Timmy:“I can see your bra strap.” The teacher frowned. Teacher:“Go home. You’re not coming back to class for a week.” Timmy got…
A wife casually called her husband at the office one afternoon. Wife:“Hi, how are you?” Husband:“I’m fine.” Wife:“What did you have for lunch today?” The husband sighed. Husband:“Don’t you have anything else to ask? It’s always the same silly questions:…
An old man in Mississippi was sitting on his front porch, enjoying the sunrise, when he saw the neighbor’s boy walking by carrying something large under his arm. Old Man:“Hey, boy! What you got there?” Boy:“A roll of chicken wire.”…
At a gas station, Jason noticed an older woman filling up her car. As he watched, he wondered whether someone her age should still be driving. The woman finished filling her tank, pulled up beside him, rolled down her window,…
A husband and wife were having a serious argument when the husband finally said, Husband:“Pack your things!” Just then, the wife’s phone rang, so the argument had to pause. It was her father calling, and the phone was on speaker.…
A husband and wife were playing a game at home. Wife:“Honey, let’s play a game.” Husband:“Okay. What’s the game?” Wife:“If I name a country, you run to the left side of the room and touch the wall. If I name…