A blind man walked into a bar with a bear on a chain and a parrot sitting on his shoulder.
The bartender looked up and said,
“Hey! No animals are allowed in here!”
“We’re not just animals, buster!” the parrot replied.
“I’m not talking to you,” said the bartender.
“I’m talking to the guy.”
The parrot rolled his eyes.
“In case you haven’t noticed, the guy you’re talking to is deaf, mute, and blind!”
“I’m his service bird. I do all of his talking for him. So if you talk to him, you’re really talking to me. Don’t be such a jackass!”
The bartender looked at the parrot for a moment.
“Alright, birdbrain,” he said. “If you’re a talking service bird, then I guess the bear must be a seeing-eye bear?”
“Nope,” the parrot replied.
“The bear is a bodyguard.”
The bartender looked confused.
“What does a blind, deaf, and mute man need a bodyguard for?”
The parrot shouted,
“The bodyguard isn’t his, you dummy!”
“He’s mine!”