A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students.
She asked, “Mike, what’s your problem?”
Mike replied, “I’m too smart for first grade! My sister is in third grade, and I’m smarter than she is. I think I should be in third grade too!”
Ms. Brooks had enough. She took Mike to the principal’s office.
While Mike waited outside, Ms. Brooks explained the situation to the principal.
The principal decided to give Mike a test. If he couldn’t answer any of the questions, he would return to first grade and behave.
Mike agreed.
The principal began:
“What is 3 × 3?”
“9,” Mike answered.
“What is 6 × 6?”
“36.”
The questions continued, and Mike answered every one correctly.
The principal looked at Ms. Brooks and said, “I think Mike can go to third grade.”
Ms. Brooks replied, “Let me ask him a few questions.”
The principal agreed.
Ms. Brooks asked, “What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?”
Mike thought for a moment.
“Legs.”
“Correct,” said Ms. Brooks.
“What is in your pants that you have but I don’t?”
The principal looked surprised by the question.
Mike answered, “Pockets.”
“Correct.”
“What does a dog do that a man steps into?”
“Pants.”
The principal’s mouth dropped open.
Ms. Brooks continued, “What goes in hard and pink and comes out soft and sticky?”
The principal’s eyes widened.
Before he could say anything, Mike answered, “Bubble gum.”
The principal was getting nervous.
Ms. Brooks asked, “What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down, and a dog does on three legs?”
“Shake hands,” Mike replied.
The principal was practically trembling.
Finally, Ms. Brooks asked, “What word starts with an ‘F’ and ends with a ‘K’ and means a lot of heat and excitement?”
Mike confidently answered, “Firetruck!”
The principal breathed a huge sigh of relief.
He turned to Ms. Brooks and said,
“Put Mike in the fifth grade. I got the last six questions wrong!”